The holiday season is around the corner, and families with divorced parents may find it difficult to split time with their children. While this is understandable, it is important to follow the custody plan in place and to make the most of the time you have with your children. Here are five tips to keep in mind as the holidays approach.

Put the children first: Holidays can be a time when many great memories are formed for children. Instead of worrying about why your ex was 10 minutes late to drop off the children or whether a new love interest of your ex’s will be at a holiday event, focus on what you can do to make the holidays a joyous time for your children. If it is possible, you may want to try to do some activity with your children and ex.

Be patient and understanding: The holidays are hard on divorced parents because part of the time, they will be away from their children. Remember that when you have the children, your ex does not and he or she probably misses them greatly. This can be a lonely time, especially if it is your first year divorced or if other family is not nearby. Try to keep these dynamics in mind when interacting with your ex.

In addition, it is important to be patient with your children, who are going through a big transition. It may be hard to hear, “I’d rather be with Dad,” but these feelings will pass with time.

Start new traditions: Children love traditions, so take some time to decide what you would enjoy doing year after year to commemorate the holidays.

Seek out other celebrations: If you do not have your children for a holiday, it may be helpful for you to keep busy with other family or friends. Sitting home alone and thinking about what fun your children are having could create unhealthy thoughts and resentments.

Hold up your end of the custody plan: Even though you may not be happy with your current custody plan, it is critical to follow it until you can formally get it changed. Holding up your side of the agreement will help create goodwill with your ex, which could be useful if you decide to renegotiate the plan down the line.

Contact a San Jose, CA Child Custody Attorney

Are your holidays not going as planned? If despite your best efforts, you are unhappy with your child custody holiday schedule with your ex, you have options. A trusted San Jose, CA child custody lawyer will listen to your concerns, lay out several options and then attempt to change your custody plan through negotiation or through the courts. To contact the Dominion Law Group, LLP, call 408-288-5592


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