Breaking the news to your children about divorce is a conversation that every parent dreads. There are, however, a few simple things a parent can say and do to help make this talk a little easier.
Consider the following tips when speaking to your child about divorce.
Ask what the child already knows. It is critical to start here so that you and your child are on the same page. Children pick up on many things, and they may understand that a divorce is imminent. However, they also may not fully understand what the outcomes of a divorce will be. Children often have misconceptions and misunderstandings. By asking what the child already knows can dispel some of the untruths that your child has.Keep your answers simple. Tailor your responses to the child’s age. If you have several children, you may have to talk to each one individually. Try not to get ahead of yourself, and keep in mind that you may not have all the answers to how a divorce will play out. Keeping the answers simple will avoid unnecessary worry on the part of the children.Understand your child’s main concerns. For smaller children, they are often concerned with their own safety. Make your child feel physically safe at all times during these conversations and when discussing future plans.Ask your child questions. It is important for a child to feel like his or her emotions are heard. Asking “How do you feel?” can convey that you care about your child and that your child is a consideration in the divorce process. Keep the conversation going. Many children will have continuing concerns. Younger children often ask the same question over and over again. It is important to keep in mind that this is new territory for a child and that getting to a place of understanding can take time. As the conversation progresses, you may be able to add in additional details that you initially left out.
Contact a San Jose Divorce Lawyer
Another way you can make the divorce process go as smoothly as possible for your family is to hire an attorney. An experienced family law attorney knows what arrangements work in real life. An attorney can also be useful in diffusing tense situations between parents and in keeping the case from reaching the courtroom by negotiating with the other side from the beginning.
Some people believe that hiring an attorney will escalate the situation; however, this does not have to be the case. A skilled divorce attorney will adopt the tone you wish to set for the proceedings and protect your rights at the same time. Call the compassionate San Jose, CA child custody attorney at Dominion Law Group, LLP at 408-288-5592.
Source:
http://www.pbs.org/parents/talkingwithkids/strategies_10.html